The Four Stages of Domestic Abuse
Upworthy posted this today… It’s just another terrifying reality of harassment and abuse. This tells me two things:
1. We shouldn’t be too quick to judge people who stay in abusive relationships; instead we should offer our support and presence. Especially if part of an abusive relationship is to isolate and/or alienate the victim.
2. Harassers and abusers are constantly testing the waters. We, as a society, need to make sure to push back and let it be known that we will not put up with it. That shit doesn’t fly here!
You can check out the original Upworthy post at the link below:
This was recorded by the Portsmouth Sinfonia in an experiment where all the members of the orchestra would swap instruments with each other and attempt to play them to the best of their ability.
favorite things about this
- literally all the brass starts to get the hang of it and then the crescendos happen and everyone is like FUCK FUCK FUCK??? FUCK. JUST. BLOW RLY HARD.
- the strings are lazy but also the same. like u can tell a lot of the ppl w/ the stringed instruments may already basically know how to play stringed instruments. like there’s definitely a section at the beginning where you hear a good portion going “oh yeah this is like. a smaller/bigger version of what i do.”
- all you hear of any woodwinds is just “pffffttt??? pFFFTTTT???? PFFFFFTTTT I SAID PFFFFTTTT!!!!!” bc woodwinds are fucking HARD and you hear after like the first crescendo half of them just give up. they give up. they’re done. fuck this it tastes weird and my lips hurt.
- that trumpet. that person is fucking TRYING man they fucking GOT this. they may not have figured out notes but they figured out LOUD and they GOT this.
I JUST DIED
I SEARCHED THIS POST FOR AGES OH MY GOD
this is amazing
In general, I think we need to move away from the premise that being a good person is a fixed immutable characteristic and shift towards seeing being good as a practice. And it is a practice that we carry out by engaging with our imperfections. We need to shift towards thinking that being a good person is like being a clean person. Being a clean person is something you maintain and work on every day.We don’t assume ‘I am a clean person therefore I don’t need to brush my teeth.’ When someone suggests to us that we have something stuck in our teeth we don’t say to them ‘What do you mean I have something stuck in my teeth—but I’m a clean person?!’
Jay Smooth in his TED speech “how I learned to stop worrying and love discussing race” (via tropicanastasia)
Jay Smooth almost always a reblog
Dude nailed it. We all need to work at being good. Even if we think we are.
Jay Smooth crushing it, what else is knew
James Arthur - “Young” by Tulisa (acoustic version)
great scene, great analogy
only the cool kids would have this thought if they saw this tree
DEAR ABBY: My husband and I relocated to Florida a little over a year ago and were quickly welcomed into our new neighbors’ social whirl. Two couples in the neighborhood are gay — one male, one female. While they are nice enough, my husband and I did not include them when it was our turn to host because we do not approve of their lifestyle choices. Since then, we have been excluded from neighborhood gatherings, and someone even suggested that we are bigots!
Abby, we moved here from a conservative community where people were pretty much the same. If people were “different,” they apparently kept it to themselves. While I understand the phrase “when in Rome,” I don’t feel we should have to compromise our values just to win the approval of our neighbors. But really, who is the true bigot here? Would you like to weigh in? — UNHAPPY IN TAMPA
DEAR UNHAPPY: I sure would. The first thing I’d like to say is that regardless of what you were told in your previous community, a person’s sexual orientation isn’t a “lifestyle choice.” Gay people don’t choose to be gay; they are born that way. They can’t change being gay any more than you can change being heterosexual.
I find it interesting that you are unwilling to reciprocate the hospitality of people who welcomed you and opened their homes to you, and yet you complain because you are receiving similar treatment.
From where I sit, you may have chosen the wrong place to live because it appears you would be happier in a less integrated neighborhood surrounded by people who think the way you do. But if you interact only with people like yourselves, you will have missed a chance for growth, which is what you have been offered here. Please don’t blow it.
Bizarrely (or perhaps appropriately) enough, The Voice of Holland has multiple excellent covers of Bob Marley songs on the books. This one is a cover of “No Woman, No Cry” performed by Lenny.
Egypt PSA: Put yourself in her shoes, instead of finding ways to blame her
Any person who wants to create a socially just society ought to empathize with those suffering from oppressive behavior. Props to UN Women for making this great video that helps people do that.